- I’m really hungry, but too tired to go to the market. What should I do?

Clip your toenails, mix them with some hair pie and garnish them with a booger?
Or get home delivery…
Guy Blews (aka Dr. Smack) - www.SmackTherapy.com

- If I dressed up like a French Maid and cooked for my boyfriend, why didn’t he have sex with me?

Dr. Smack is going for the hopeful option here:
Your boyfriend was too full to f*ck.
(I never understood why people eat before planning on having sex… think about it… shouldn’t we eat afterwards?!)
Guy Blews (aka. Dr. Smack) - www.SmackTherapy.com